Saturday, July 5, 2014

Very Brand New.

I realized I used to be a lost ship.

I didn't really fancy doing anything for myself, chasing what I want and making myself become a better person. I was constantly waiting for something to happen to me. Or should I say, I was waiting for a break. A lucky break.

Then it came.

Quit the publishing job to join a digital marketing agency and left in two days, I would have incurred a substantial amount of severance package of about 10k had I stayed in Wiley and waited for them to retrench me instead. That money is not a small sum and I wonder if I'll ever see such a sum in my life. Joining the digital marketing agency was a big mistake. That until today, I still feel bile at the back of my throat thinking about the place and its people.

I was out of job for about three weeks and almost slipped into a depressed funk but then my lucky break came. I cannot reiterate how grateful I am to my present company, my boss and my CEO for wanting to hire and groom me -- at a reasonable salary which will then be adjusted again upon my probation. Money aside. Think about how decent beings they are for not wanting to short change you even though you don't have relevant experience. I know that is what most companies do. But they didn't. And the amount of time and effort grooming me and helping me learn my ropes, it's simply priceless. Thinking about this, I feel really bad and I'm evermore determined to work harder and give more than I had possibly given to any organization.[Edited on 27 September 2014: No. It's all a fucking lie that was spun and I had been duped]

The career department seems in place now. So let's talk about myself.

I am starting to feel that I'm becoming a more attractive person. As in, I haven't really lost a lot of weight and my skin condition hasn't really gone back to the way it was but I do feel this sense of power coming from within. It's a type of confidence I've never experienced before. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I finally saw light at the end of the tunnel. Finally it's linear.

And I'm seeing the most wonderful person I've ever met in my entire life for about 11 months who always makes time for me, makes me laugh, cares about me, talks to me, listens to me and makes an effort to make me happy; who is also, very charming, kind, humourous, surprising, generous, gentle, gives me solid advice and suggestions when it comes to my career and has a solid career of his own. Where on earth will I ever find someone like that again?

I am a seriously happy person now. Contented, fulfilled and just smiling, working, reading, dieting and eating all the time now.