starcrossed.

If the term 'hollow' rings a bell in 'Bleach' terms to you, that is exactly what I am now - without a soul/heart. Like what a drifter should be, I packed myself in neatly into this category of mankind. Seeing how others around are gradually growing up, seeking what they should want/desire/attain for themselves threatens me into being a provoked kitty and the only defense I can put up is to show my gritting jaws and take flight. 

There's nothing scary about growing old, the ultimate fear factor has got to be growing up and still clueless on what you want to achieve. 

Lately, I had times when I went out of sorts out of the blue. Like a mind which suddenly decided to roam a bit, I couldn't do anything except to stare blankly at my boy. I didn't exactly space out, but in my mind I was wondering whether these happenings around me could be true. Is He real, blood and flesh in front of me? If he is, why do I feel that this reality is incapable of bearing my presence? Has two months gone on by in just a spur or has this been around for a long span of time? Where was I and where have I been? I couldn't recall much. And at the point of time when my mind couldn't recollect nothing, I rooted myself to where I was some time 1 year 5 months back. 

Like a wave of ongoing things, like an endless rush for euphoria, and the eventuality of coming to an end, if the seeking of our desires and wants drives us forward , what would be the aftermath of attainment? If by death we strip ourselves to our thresholds, do we even die knowing who we are?

A single gesture could produce thousand of thoughts in the mind who's responsible for the act, and one who eyed the act. The hidden agenda performed last night was definitely apparent enough to a pair of eagle eyes and a sensitive mind.