Hate Post #1.

I have been lazy to read. I have been really lazy to do almost everything I have always enjoyed. It's been so long I stopped drawing. I just don't see the drive anymore. Like everything is gone. My mind is wickedly infused with something. And I have no clue what it is.

I am contented. But I ain't happy. I realise I was happier when I wasn't contented. What does that imply about me?! I am a depressive. Depressives never want to be happy so they can be sad. Fuck. Fuck. Am I really one?

Now I have an identity crisis. For god's sake at the age of 23?! Am I really a bi? Omfg, I am spouting nonsense.

Gone.

Gone.

Gone with the wind.

Gone is the rapture that thrilled my heart.

I kinda notice this cute guy at Paul Smith, Wisma. He's always looking in my direction too. What does that mean? Is he always wondering whether I am a tranny or what? He sure looks a lil like Aloysius though. Substitute.

You know what? I am a fucken cb slut. I can tell you. I am afraid that Nic might see these one day. But I am just... God damn selfish ya know. Some by sins rise, some by virtues fall. You know? You know.

I have a sudden kick to snap photos. Photos of trees, flowers, rivers, ponds and lakes. Mountains, sunsets, the greenery. I want to watch clouds. Can someone taciturn enough bring me please?

Okay. This is something about me. There are some guys out there, if they know how I am like, they'd really take their stand good enough and just go with the flow and enjoy what I am like. But there are just some mentally challenged ones who are trying to outwit/out-talk/out-think/out... out... out... whatever it is, I have no clue what the fuck would they want to do that for. It's just... I don't know. If by being a FUCKING PLAIN JANE, SIMPLE GIRL NEXT DOOR WHO DOESN'T WEAR BRA AND WATER HER BONSAI AND GREET YOU A GOOD MORNING WHEN SHE SEES YOU, AND TOLDCHA BLESS YOU WHEN YOU SNEEZE, makes you happy, then go to Far east plaza, go to Orchard towers, you could try Mayflower primary school too. I'm just having not much time for the haters.

Cat licking off the fucking cream. I admit I don't have many I chat to under my MSN list. And that's because I am selective when it comes to friends, and talkers. I don't "Hi and bye" people. But I need no shit asses, brains through muscles kinda guys to come stimulate me. Just... beat it and scram. I am carrying out the filteration of my MSN list, and I do this every year. And I know no one knows unless you discover I don't rememeber you or talk to you anymore. As if it's not short enough, I prefer my MSN to be meaningful.

Please. Brush up your english and learn to spell mesmerise or mesmerize. Not Mesmorise or what.

Yeah. I am mocking at you know who you are.

Come. Taunt me soon.